This pandemic has caused a lot of us to have stressors we never thought we’d have. It seems we didn’t have any time to prepare for this and it may also seem as if we don’t have anywhere or anyone to turn to for help. There are so many things going on right now. With that being said, some things just can’t come to a screeching halt while we navigate through this unique time in our lives. Motherhood is one of those things.
Motherhood is already a complex job to say the least. It is very rewarding yet can be very, very demanding. As a mother you are the caregiver, the nurturer, the chef, the chauffeur, the organizer, and facilitator—of all things it seems. Furthermore, these days not only are women mothers but we are also professionals. We have careers. We are breadwinners. We are bosses. With that being said, we are still mothers. Prior to this pandemic we are now facing we had more opportunities to escape for a moment to pause, process, and then press play again, you know? Recharge.
Imagine taking on all of the motherly tasks that you normally do take on. Then all of a sudden you have to add on teacher, barber, entertainer, etc. I could honestly, go on. The icing on the cake is that now you cannot go anywhere—neither can your kids! Now it’s as if you’re are always on “play.”
Mothers need “Me Time!” Self-care! We need it more now than probably ever before in our lives! How can you squeeze in the “Me Time?” It may seem impossible these days but these 5 ways to combat the stressors are simple. The only work involved in this is you making the effort to stop and think, “ I need take care of myself for a moment.
1. Recognize When You Are Stressed
Recognizing when you are stressed is a key point! Think about a time when you’ve reached your boiling point. What did you do at that boiling point? Next time you’re at that point where you feel like you’re about to explode, stop and ask yourself a few things. “Am I tired?” “Am I hungry?” “Am I feeling overwhelmed?” “Did I over-do it today?” I know it may sound simple and very minor but it is important to recognize when you need to stop and take a breather.
2. Take a 20-minute break
Now I know you’re probably wondering, “When am I supposed to in squeeze in 20 minutes!?! Try these times; When those dishes need to be washed—take a break before you get started. Literally, sit down and do nothing (no folding laundry, no fussing about toys on the floor, no adding a few things to the grocery list, nothing). Another way to squeeze in a break is sitting in your car. I don’t mean going to get in your car and just sit there (although that can work too). Rather, when you get back home from picking everyone up—let everyone in the house and you sit in the car for a while. Another way to squeeze in a break is to treat your self. Treat yourself to that scoop of chocolate ice cream or that caramel latte. Indulge for just a moment. There are several ways to take that break and there are no wrong ways. Do what works for you but squeeze in a small break for yourself and to yourself.
3. Exercise
Not only is it a great way to stay healthy it is also a great way to relieve stress. You can do this alone or with your children. You can blow off steam and burn off some of that energy children often have. Two birds. One stone!
4. Meditate
Breathing exercises are a part of meditating. They are helpful in relaxing your mind and body. Breathing exercises also helps lower blood pressure and can also decrease signs and symptoms of depression and anxiety. Take some deep breaths and try to focus on just your breathing and nothing else. It’s ok if your mind wanders just come back to your breathing. Doing some deep breathing for a few minutes can help you calm yourself down when in a stressful environment or situation.
5. Online Support Groups
Dealing with the many ups and downs of motherhood can leave you feeling alone sometimes. You can have the best support system in your; husband, the grandparents, aunts and uncles, you name it—yet you still feel like no one understands what you’re going through. There are so many online support groups out there specifically for mothers. Here are a couple to stare: hellomytribe.com and ppdil.org
Brandis Smith, MSW, LSW
Brandis sees therapy clients in Plainfield, IL and telehealth clients throughout the state of IL. She can be reached at Brandis@hammondpsychologicalservices.com.